Match Report v ELC

VS
ELC Rovers
(03/07/07)

FINAL SCORE WON 5-1 (Half-time winning 2-1)

REPORT BY FAIR UNBIASED EXTERNAL CONSULTANT BROUGHT IN BY QPT……

Scorers (Lamba Pug(Husky) 2, God(amin), Vacuum (Mohamed ofcourse!), Mutley (Mali)

MOM – AMIN (followed VERY VERY closely by YASIR)

Conditions : Dry at start…wet later yes its summer……. Venue: Witton Park Astroturf (Pitch 3) K/O Time : 21.00

Referee : Cocky Busty Babes Thick Annoying Dodgy Decisionmaker DAD!

Recent form (past 4 games)-
Team Players on form
Lost 5-3 Saif 8 - - 8 - 7
Won 2-1 Usama 7 - - 7 - 7
Won 4-1 Saeed 6 - - 6 - 8
Won x-x Nakhuda 6 - - 6 - 8

QPT PLAYER CAM (Ratings) -
GK - Yasir 9.9 – Did NOTHING wrong, superb when called for, some great saves, good routine saves and handling fantastic. Why he’s not in the premier league amazes me!
CEN BK – Sully Chotia – 9- even at 50% match fitness, his reading of the game is amazing. Does have moments where he looks like he’ll make a mistake but hasn’t done so so far. Some great passes and runs…..covered big mans back at times!
CEN BK – Nakhuda 9 – NO COMMENT!
CEN MID - Amin 10 – Put it in all the way. Extremely impressed with his mature and intelligent defending, just dropping in front of defence to save energy and help team out when under pressure at times. Deservedly scored…..MOM (CoincidentallyYasir borrow his car today out !)
RIGHT MID – Husky L 9 –. Wow big feet scored two great goals…..its the extra reach for the first one and aggressive nature for second!!! Worked his socks off – stop smoking and play more often = lasting longer for game!
LEFT MID – Imran Mayat 9 – Buy some trainers would stop him messing up like he did on first goal…then set up three…defended worked his arse off…..transferred back…the legend is back!.enough said!!!
STRIKER - Ish Chotia 6 – Truth hurts,,,but truth is missed chances, misplaced passes and lost the ball too many times. Oh well….had his bad game when team won…back to normal next week please…..
Subs
STRIKER – Ebrahim 8 – Cant give someone 7 for doing nothing wrong! Clearly still injured backing out of challenges. Did what he had to!
Left Mid – Mohammed Ali 8 – Scored! Needs to just calm himself down when receiving ball…..tazmanian devillike all the time!! Another grafter – good defending and linked up well up front.
Defender – YASIN 9 – Came on for Imran, made some important blocks extremely important! Yasir would have saved them but…….. is he starting next game????

Match Summary
The game started with Imran turning up in moulds, Mohamed forgetting the ball, Amin comin right on time and Sully looking like an Arab!!! But Captain YASIR seemed to boost everyones morale by being there ready and buzzing to go – amazing performance considering he played a full game at jjb before but anyway……
Imran put Yasins trainers on and a ROUTINE one two with Yasir wen wrong wen IMRAN misplaced his pass straight to the striker and 1-0 to them within 5. Noone can blame YASIR! Yasir took ball out of nets and SPURRED the team on……..The constant instructions sent out by the captain was clearly having an effect on what is normally a quiet team with no leader but he took the role like fish to water!!!
Imran whipped one in and Bigfoot lambat slammed a volley in Mark Hughes style – Yas looked on nervously. Again motivating his troops imran must have heard his call and whipped his cross in for husky to head, knee, elbow, shoot but it went in nevertheless. This one seemed to be for captain marvel Amin scored a 3rd again set up by the player recruited and enticed back to the club by messiah Yasir! The legends (amin, yas, imran, sully, ishy chots, husky……is that everyone!!??) were flying….
2nd half teamtalk led by Yasir organised the team – great handling in nets by yas did what he was asked to when called for. Great one on one save again by yasir (who els!!?) led straight to a counter and Mohamed tapped it in OPEN GOAL! Turning around he seemed to point to best friend and mentor yasir showing his appreciation at covering his back in the move……..mutley the devil finished things with another well taken goal. Yasir wasn’t involved but his spirit was apparent!!!
Ishy chots finishin was clearly missing, the fans were calling for yasir to go upfront – he did and a shot was flying in but then a sudden freak wind came across and swerved it wide! Amin and jealousy sprung to mind!!!
QPT should feel privileged to have YAS’ presence again – no coincidence they’ve only conceded 2 in last two compared with 18 in first four……….should have his expenses paid for too. Sources within the club feel their sudden resurgence after their first three games (3 losses) is all being put down to the return of SUPER Yas, and his leadership skills. Another factor which has already proven of worth is the signing of Imran, again totally down to the great man, great keeper, overall great person YAS!

Feel free to add your comments on the blog - http://www.queensparktorpedoes.blogspot.com


MEDIA FRENZY (Tabloid Edition) –
RUMOURS WITHIN THE CLUB AMAZINGLY CLAIM THAT GOALKEEPER YASIR HAS REFUSED TO PLAY NEXT WEEKS GAME!!! ALLEGEDLY STORMING INTO MANAGER NAKHUDAS OFFICE, YASIR IS SAID TO BE FUMING WITH THE RECORD NUMBER OF TIME HIS NAME HAS BEEN MENTIONED IN THE LATEST MATCH REPORT. A SOURCE CLOSE TO THE CLUB WAS PREPARING NAKHUDAS HALF HOURLY MEAL AT THE TIME “YAS WAS FUMING, HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN A MODEST, HUMBLE PERSON, AND AFTER READING THE MATCH REPORT HE INSISTED HIS TEAMMATES GET ALL THE PRAISE. HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN A TEAM PLAYER. BUT NAKHUDA INSISTED HE WASN’T GOING TO ASK FOR IT TO BE CHANGED” YASIR STORMED OFF TAKING NAKHUDAS FOOD WITH HIM IN A BIG UMBRO BAG!!! BOTH WERE NOT HAPPY! BRING ON NEXT WEEK……

TWO CONCERNED QPT FANS RANG 999 CLAIMING TO HAVE SEEN AND SPOKEN TO QPT MISFIRING STRIKER ISH CHOTIA. “HE WAS JUST SITTING ON THE LEEDS CANAL EDGE, LOOKING DOWN WITH A CAN OF BEER IN ONE HAND AND WHAT LOOKED LIKE A WHITE POWDERY SUBSTANCE NEXT TO HIM” WE WERE UNABLE TO GET HOLD OF ISH – FEARS OF SUICIDE HAVE BEEN INCREASED AS THE CANAL GETS SEARCHED FOR WHAT POLICE HAVE DESCRIBED AS “A SMALL PACKAGE”

QPT FANS HAVE HAILED THE SIGNING AND RETURN OF LEGENDARY FULL BACK IMRAN MAYAT. SOME HAVE EVEN CLAIMED HE WILL LEAD THE TEAM STRAIGHT TO THE TOP!!! ONE FAN SAID IT WAS THE BEST NEWS SINCE SEEING YASIR BACK IN NETS! CAN YOU GET A BETTER COMPARISON??????
QPT to go public